7 Reasons You May Need Marriage Therapy
Jun 07, · Marriage counseling gives couples the tools to communicate better, negotiate differences, problem solve and even argue in a healthier way. Marriage counseling is generally provided by licensed therapists known as marriage and family therapists. Marriage Counseling supports emotional safety and connection. Expert marriage counselors do many things to help couples (education, coaching, skills, new ideas, emotional support, accountability) but most importantly, they provide a safe environment where a couple can communicate without the influence of negative communication patterns.
Sign up for our monthly Lifestyle newsletter for entertainment news, healthy living tips and more. For some it's battles about money; for others it's a sex life that's lacking or a pattern of constant arguing. And the coronavirus pandemic has added yet another potential stressor: more time at home together, which can marrlage tensions or expose hidden cracks in a relationship. Therapy can help. Contrary to what some may believe, it's not about finger-pointing — who did what or who is to blame.
Eye-rollers, take note: According to the American Psychological Association, about 75 percent of couples who opt for therapy say it improves their relationships.
Many partners struggle together for years before trying therapy, says Gail Saltz, M. A major roadblock to getting help? When only one person in a relationship is eager for change. After years of marriage, some couples no longer engage with each other and merely coexist as sntail.
Divorce incidence peaks at different times, says David Woodsfellow, a clinical psychologist and couples therapist and founder and director of the Woodsfellow Institute for Couples, in Atlanta. That second divorce is usually a growing-apart divorce. It's about avoidance, not fighting. Then something happens — they retire or become empty nesters — and they look at each other and think, Who are we as a couple now? Couples often forget what brought them together in the first place, why they fell in love, Saltz observes.
Couples therapy can help reignite that. Money has always been a contentious issue for couples, but throw in additional late-in-life concerns that baby boomers confront — potential health problems, fewer and fewer years of earning power, not to mention lousy interest rates — and what are the best winter motorcycle gloves got an atmosphere ripe for financial friction.
Counsdling a Harris Interactive poll, 36 percent of married to year-olds said money matters cause arguments with spouses. Clashes may stem from differing spending styles or disagreements on how to save for, and spend, retirement.
There may be stress about not having enough money, or inequalities in the way your nest egg is marrisge managed. Therapy helps people understand their relationship with money and the way that it shapes their thoughts about themselves and about other people, Coambs explains. Often, the way we view and handle finances is linked to past experiences.
He has clients couhseling a family tree and talk about how financial matters were treated in each partner's family — how their parents saved, spent and discussed money. One dies the most common reasons for going to couples therapy: attempting to repair a breach of trust — song hallelujah what a savior less delicate terms, cheating.
The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy has found that 15 percent of married women and 25 percent of married men report having had an extramarital affair. But, to be sure, cheating doesn't only mean physical infidelity. Then, all of a sudden, it's more than that. How to tell when you've crossed the line? That's tricky. If you're tempted to stray, it's better to try counseling now than face marriahe fallout later.
And if one partner has already had an affair, there's what does marriage counseling entail a way back. About a third of married couples survive an affair, Saltz says, but generally, they're the ones who go for treatment and make every effort to save the union. What does marriage counseling entail all have different ways of handling conflict. Some of us thrive on confrontation; others turn heel when things get heated.
And then there are the passive-aggressive types. Big blowouts can leave behind tears and hurt feelings, but frequent bickering can be just as destructive.
An argument is not in and of itself a bad thing; rather, it's the way people handle the conflict that can make it unhealthy, Woodsfellow explains. Put another way: It's not necessarily what you say but how you say it.
Couples therapy teaches you how to diffuse disagreements in a healthy way — reasonably and respectfully. Woodsfellow says that how the conversation begins is crucial. Stay away from always and never. And don't pull out the past, Saltz advises. Get instant access to discounts, programs, services, and the information you need to benefit every area of your life.
It could be an illness, retirement or having the last of your children move out. I'm not even sure I like who you are. Suddenly finding yourself caring for an ill parentwhich can consume a big portion of your time and attention, presents a different set of challenges. If your spouse doesn't understand the stress or isn't supportive, it can stir up feelings of counselint and resentment. Couples therapy can help you deal with the new normal by restoring the connection you and your partner once shared.
The number one response from 47 percent of the participants : a lack of love or intimacy. For some, it's a lackluster sex life. Years of doing the same thing in the sack can make sex less enjoyable, says McManus.
But little intimacies — like the occasional peck on the cheek, listening to your partner's stories, and small gestures of kindness — can be just as important for helping you and your partner feel connected. There are plenty of couples who are affectionate and emotionally intimate but not sexually intimate, McManus notes.
Couples ckunseling is useful when one or both of you is not satisfied with your level of intimacy. It can be difficult for people to talk about something this personal, but a good therapist can help guide the conversation and should know how to make you both feel more comfortable discussing intimate subjects.
Sometimes couples have mixed agendas. One person wants to split up or get divorced, and the other one wants to save the relationship. If it's become apparent that this isn't a marriage that can what does marriage counseling entail, therapy can be doe way of providing for a less toxic split. You are leaving AARP. Please return to AARP. You'll start receiving the latest news, benefits, events, and programs related to AARP's mission to empower people to choose how they live as they age.
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It's a process of growing together…
Nov 27, · Almost every counselor in the world says that they do marriage counseling, but most never received any training. Often, they got a degree in psychology or therapy and feel that they can do it. Marriage counseling isn’t just one person and his or her issues. It’s two people, their issues, and interaction and dynamics of those chesapeakecharge.com: Racheal Tasker.
Bobby is the host of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. The truth is that when a relationship is stressed, negative communication patterns creep into many interactions. It becomes extremely difficult to have a productive, helpful conversation where you can actually feel closer, more connected, and find solutions to a problem. Instead, negative communication makes a couple react badly to each other and conversations escalate into fights, disintegrate — or people just stop talking.
In marriage counseling, you are getting support in hearing each other, and learning how to be responsive to what your partner is saying. Expert marriage counselors do many things to help couples education, coaching, skills, new ideas, emotional support, accountability but most importantly, they provide a safe environment where a couple can communicate without the influence of negative communication patterns.
This allows people to really listen to each other, and understand each other. With this understanding often comes empathy, feelings of emotional closeness, new solutions to old problems, and a desire to change for the better. In this emotional climate, it becomes easier to unravel negative patterns that cause problems outside of the counseling room and create positive, lasting change.
Talking to each other intimately, and fostering emotional connection and understanding is the first phase of marriage counseling. It helps couples have new, healing experiences with each other and reconnect with their love.
However, talking about things isn't enough. In Marriage Counseling, just like anything else, the only thing that will really change your relationship is taking positive action.
This means that you need to follow through with the things that you talk about in marriage counseling. There are many therapists who work with couples who do not have specialized training and experience in marriage counseling.
Many times these well meaning therapists can help couples have productive conversations, but the work stops there. The marriage counselors of Growing Self specialize in positive, action oriented strategies that will help you make real-world changes. Once you've developed understanding and connection through supported conversations, you can expect to leave your marriage counseling sessions with practical solutions for how to maintain the positive changes in your relationship.
Marriage counseling works on a number of different levels to help you and your partner create a happier relationship, and it happens in phases.
I like to use the metaphor of gardening to help people understand the process. On the first level, marriage counseling works because you and your partner have made the choice together to seek help in making things better. Making the decision to enter marriage counseling is like preparing the soil for the seeds of change to be planted. As an unbiased third party, we can get to know both of you and then help you two to understand each other.
As your marriage counselor comes to understand each of your feelings then he or she can then interpret what you are really saying and feeling to your partner in a way that they can understand. Your marriage counselor will help you transcend the repetitive fights that may be happening now, and you will begin to have new perspective. Your marriage counselor helps you understand the systemic patterns occurring between the two of you.
You begin to understand how you are each affecting the other, and perhaps contributing to the other's position in the relationship, and then you will be more able to make different choices. During the time of new understanding the seeds of change are planted. Then your marriage counselor will work with you to come up with ideas of how to do things differently at home, based on the conversations you are having in marriage counseling sessions. You marriage counselor will help you to see what behaviors you both might be engaging in during interactions with each other that are not helpful.
You will start to experiment with new ways of doing things. During this time the seeds of true change begin to grow. Communication skills are another important area of good marriage counseling. Learning how to talk so that your partner can listen to you is an essential relationship skill, as is deep listening and personal reflection.
Learning how to intentionally listen to your partner is not always an easy thing to do. Being in a supportive environment with your marriage counselor, where you and your partner are to able take in what each is saying will help your connection with each other to grow. It will also support the growth of the new skills you are practicing. Harvesting The beautiful harvest season of all of this growth is increased maturity in each of you, new empathy for each other, and new enjoyment of each other.
When you understand how you're each affecting the other and are able to communicate the love and attachment that is underneath it all, you can transcend any conflict.
You will have happy new experiences with each other that will reinforce all the growth you have accomplished. We have walked with many couples along this journey of connection, growth, and change. Couples who go through the process of successful marriage counseling leave with a newfound sense of commitment, appreciation, and love for their partner.
They go on to use the techniques and ways of communicating in our sessions. And then… life happens. Babies are born, new jobs are taken, people change and grow again. A relationship with a good marriage counselor offers long-term support for your marriage.
We are committed to helping you have a happy, healthy relationship together. You provided us such a safe place to be honest with ourselves and with each other our fear of being vulnerable and weak were transformed into a feeling of opportunity to be heard. My husband and I are better friends, parents, lovers and companions than we have ever been. The marriage counselor, couples therapists and premarital counselors of Growing Self have specialized training and years of experience in helping couples reconnect.
We use only evidence based strategies that have been proven by research to help you restore your strong bond, and love your relationship again. Roseann Pascale is a marriage counselor, therapist, and life coach with years of experience in helping couples communicate more effectively, find new solutions to old problems, repair their strong bond, rebuild trust after affairs, successfully blend families , improve their sexual intimacy, and parent joyfully together.
Roseann is a former student of the legendary family therapist Salvador Minuchin, and has a strong foundation in systemic, evidence based approaches to couples and family therapy that emphasize helping you both make positive changes to your life mindfully, and create an intentional relationship that honors your deepest needs. Roseann is licensed as a marriage and family therapist in New York and Florida, and is available for online marriage counseling and relationship coaching.
Kensington is a relationship counselor and coach, she provides relationship counseling, relationship coaching, marriage counseling, and also pre-marital counseling. She provides clients with a safe, supportive, non-judgmental environment where they can feel understood, gain insight, and create lasting change in the most meaningful parts of their lives. Meagan Terry is a relationship specialist. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over nine years of experience in helping couples reconnect, and enjoy each other again.
In addition to working one-on-one with couples, she teaches our Lifetime of Love premarital and relationship class. Request a Free Consultation Silas H. Silas is an engaging, friendly and relatable couples counselor, therapist and life coach. He utilizes the evidence-based Gottman Method of marriage counseling with is couples, which emphasizes healthy communication skills training , restoring the strong foundation of commitment and friendship at the core of your marriage, and how to show each other love and respect in the ways that are most important to each of you.
Silas is available to meet with you in person for marriage counseling in Broomfield, Colorado. He also provides online marriage counseling and online relationship coaching to clients across the US and internationally. Request a Free Consultation Anastacia S. Anastacia's authentic, caring approach to marriage counseling and relationship coaching helps couples find each other's "noble intentions," and re-commit to showing each other love and respect.
She can help you heal old hurts, improve your communication, restore trust, and work together as a team. Dori is a kind, empathetic couples counselor, individual therapist, and life coach who specializes in sex therapy, and helping couples create healthy emotional and sexual intimacy.
Her friendly style makes it safe to talk about anything, and her solution-focused approach helps you move past the past, and into a bright new future of intimacy and connection. Georgi is an incredibly kind, compassionate marriage counselor and premarital counselor who has a knack for bringing out the best in both of you.
Georgi practices evidence-based Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, which helps you restore your empathy for each other, see each other's noble intentions, and helps you create a strong, secure attachment bond of love and appreciation. Her approach focuses on helping you repair your emotional connection first, which then makes it easier solving problems and make behavioral changes.
Georgi's services are exclusively available to residents of Arkansas. She can meet with you in person for marriage counseling in Bentonville, AR or she can meet with you for couples therapy online if you live in Arkansas. Just knowing that you were going to ask me about my homework made me do it.
I did things with you that I couldn't do on my own. If you have more questions about Marriage Counseling , we are happy to answer them in person. Schedule a free consultation session with one of our expert marriage counselors today. You can meet with them at our Denver or Westminster office locations , or through online video conferencing.
Help yourself to the best day and time right now through our online calendars , or call for personal assistance in scheduling.
In a private, professional environment we can get to know each other, you can talk about your hopes for your relationship, and start moving forward together in mending your marriage.
How Does Marriage Counseling Work? Do We Need Marriage Counseling? Does Insurance Cover Marriage Counseling? How To Choose a Marriage Counselor. Does Marriage Counseling Work? Here are some ways that marriage counseling works to help you improve your relationship:. Good Marriage Counseling helps you hear each other, and have productive conversations instead of another fight. Marriage Counseling supports emotional safety and connection.
Good Marriage counseling offers direct guidance about what to do differently. It's a process of growing together… Marriage counseling works on a number of different levels to help you and your partner create a happier relationship, and it happens in phases.
Preparing the Soil On the first level, marriage counseling works because you and your partner have made the choice together to seek help in making things better. Planting the Seeds As an unbiased third party, we can get to know both of you and then help you two to understand each other. Tending the Garden Then your marriage counselor will work with you to come up with ideas of how to do things differently at home, based on the conversations you are having in marriage counseling sessions.
Blooming Communication skills are another important area of good marriage counseling. Maintaining We have walked with many couples along this journey of connection, growth, and change. Meet a Few of Our Relationship Experts The marriage counselor, couples therapists and premarital counselors of Growing Self have specialized training and years of experience in helping couples reconnect. Roseann P. Request a Free Consultation.